March 24, 2013 by 12 Comments

What Attracts Women and Why? A Picture Essay

     I don’t understand women.  I know I’m not the only man to ever have this realization, what bugs me is that the older I get, the less I think I know and the more I realize how little I actually know about the opposite sex.

 For instance, what attracts them and why?

For instance, when I’m unshaven like this guy

 

 

But dressed like this man

 

Women with these type of jobs,

 

 

seem, to become very attracted to me.  In some cases asking for my contact information within a few minutes.

 

 

 But if  I’m clean shaven like this guy,

 

 

 

and dressed like this man

 

nothing doing.

 

 Even stranger, suit but no beard also gets no reaction.

 

As for the group of women below, I’m even more unaware of their emotions.  How I’m dressed seems to do little to change their behaviour.  Of course, I could be wrong.

 

 

 

 

 

Like so many men, I think I’m emotionally blind and simply don’t notice anything unless I’m clubbed over the head!!!

 

So dear readers, what are your thoughts?  Can anyone explain why a suit and beard gets some women hot and bothered?  Are white collar women giving off similar signals but they’re too subtle for me to notice?

Put your thoughts in the comments section and help a midlife man understand, PLEASE!!!!!.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Random Scribblings, Women
March 10, 2013 by 4 Comments

270 Words on Why You Aren’t Achieving Your New Year’s Resolutions . . . . And How To Get Back On Track

8 weeks after New Year’s Day and you’ve already forgotten your resolutions or are bummed out about the fact that you aren’t even

trying to fulfill them.  Here’s why its happening along with some resources to get you back on track:

1.  You didn’t write them down or you wrote them down but didn’t keep them someplace that they could be seen.

Out of sight is out of mind.

 

2.   You planned to rely on Motivation and Willpower – Big Mistake!

Both motivation and willpower should be thought of as muscles.  Muscles get stronger the more you use them BUT they can also be strained from overuse.  If it’s a constant mental struggle to achieve your goals, you will get tired and give up.

 

3.  Your goals were not  S.M.A.R.T  enough

Specific or Significant
Measurable or Manageable
Attainable or Ajustable
Realistic or Relevant
Time-specific or Trackable

4. You didn’t separate one time goals from goals that required a new habit, so they’re mixing together and driving you crazy.

Example: Automate finances   (One time)
Lose 20 pounds through exercise   (requires new habit)

5. You tried to do too much too soon.

One is the magic number.  One major goal and one teeny tiny new habit is all you need.

6. You got busy/distracted/bored.

Since the goals were not S.M.A.R.T you never had any real plan or it was too complex, making it easy to get busy/distracted/bored.

7. You were drunk when you made them.

Pretty much self explanatory

Watch this Youtube video on how to be properly self-motivated.

<a href=”http://www.makealivingwriting.com/?p=2516″><img src=”http://www.makealivingwriting.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/MALW_linkparty1.jpg”/></a>

Filed Under: Health, Money, Random Scribblings, Self Improvement / Personal Development
January 1, 2013 by Leave a Comment

Happy New Year To My Readers

Happy New Year To Each Of You:

     I am fully aware that I could not have made it this far without the support of my friends,  family and readers like you.  Thank you so

fireworks

Boom!  by fabiogis50

much for your love in 2012.

       I started this blog in April 2012 and did not publish the first post until May.   “Dear Citibank or Lessons in Customer Service” was originally a sample for a freelance writing client, who rejected it.  Since then it has been made into a feature article on a much larger midlife blog.
 To date, over 6,000 people have visited Writings of A Mid Life Man, which is not bad considering that in 2009 I did not know what a blog was!
With  a few exceptions,  the posts deal with self-improvement and becoming a better man.  While I’m still working on ‘finding my voice’ and improving my writing  in 2013, regular readers can expect even more articles on improving health, relationships and financial status. There’ll be articles on: How I paid off my mortage early; how I make money on the internet; and, tips on living a good life.
    It is my hope that in 2013, my readers will take the  actions that lead to LIVING THE LIFE THEY DESIRE.   Small, habitual action beats grand planning every time.

*WALKS BEHIND PODIUM TO START LECTURE*

  Two Things:  It is not that our life is so short, it is that we waste so much of it.
                              You can make a change or you can make an excuse
                               but you can’t be successful at both.

*WALKS AWAY FROM PODIUM*

Truth, Strength, Courage, Honour, Success and Blessings be yours in 2013.

Filed Under: Adventure and Travel, Health, Money, Random Scribblings, Uncategorized
October 14, 2012 by 7 Comments

The Midlife Man Volunteers and Doesn’t Hate It. Why You Should Do The Same.

Note:  Those of you looking for my post on Politics that I’d mentioned last time, please accept my apologies.  I’d signed up for BLOG ACTION DAY – THE POWER OF WE which is today, 15th of October, 2012.  I will complete the promised post next week.

 

Founder of KPACE, Darcy Moss (at left in blue shirt) with volunteers

Contrary to popular belief, its not easy being a midlife man.  I’d like to think I’m the same man I was at 35 (+10 years) but my body tells me that’s not the case.  I’m aging and not the way I want, (which is not at all) and the knowledge is making me into a crusty curmudgeon.
Honestly, I’m looking forward to becoming an old grouch with glee.  Finally, I can move even slower, than I have been doing most of my life.  I can speak my mind with impunity and blame it on age.  Best of all, I can generally make life miserable for my subordinates at work.
So when, KPACE came and asked me to volunteer for their Shoe Drive for needy students, my first response was, “Nah! just let me make a donation.”  It’s like “Bah! Humbug” without Christmas.  To make matters worse, because in my past life, I worked as a welder, they wanted me to work the grill, I guess on the assumption that since I could build a grill from an old water tank, I should be able to cook on it.  After days of waivering, I screwed up my face and my courage and went to see my friend Maverick (Yes, that really is his name) who is a welding instructor and a grill master, to borrow a grill.

The next day (8th September, 2012)  I take the grill to the primary school where the Shoe drive and Fun-Day will be held, set it up, pour in the coals, add some gas, and add fire.  In less than 10 minutes the fire is out and the grill is colder than a naked Eskimo.  The process repeats itself two more times before I decide to call Maverick for help. The only thing better than ruining a Saturday morning by volunteering is ruining it for a  friend.  Meanwhile, the volunteers of KPACE are handing out shoes, books, and school supplies.  Children of all ages are running around excitedly, getting there faces painted and screeching with laughter inside the bouncing castle.


What is KPACE?


The Kathleen Phillips Activity Centre for Education (KPACE) is an after-school program that initiated its services March 15th 2010 at the Ridgeland Primary School.  It works with students from kindergarten to grade 6.  From Monday – Friday from 3:00pm to 4:30pm volunteers assist with doing homework, reading time, science experiments, light food preparation courses, dance classes, art, craft and a whole host of educational hands-on activities.

The children enjoy guest visitors such as the Royal Bahamas Police Force (who spoke on conflict resolution), Bahamas Humane Society (speaking on animal kindness), Creative Wealth (teaching children how to “save some, spend some”) and many other interesting speakers.
The kids have participated in two Christmas musicals and are currently practicing for the third production (scheduled for Thursday, December 6th, 2012). Each year the program participates in a community service project.   Previously they’ve participated in food donor community service project with Hands 4 Hunger, where the entire school collected more than 350lbs of food for Englerston

Food collected by students for Hands for Hunger

Urban Renewal Center.  Last fall the kids collected approximately 90lbs of pennies to donate to Pennies from Heaven (a charity which gives to the underprivileged).
Once a month the kids are taken on field trips around the Island of New Providence to places many of them have never visited before such as Undersea aAdventures, Lynden Pindling International Airport, Atlantis, Educulture Junkanoo Museum, Ardastra Gardens & Zoo, National Trust bird watching at Wilson & Harold Ponds and many more interesting places.

For more information contact the founder at: kpacekids@yahoo.com

 

 

 

Impact (on me)

After Maverick got the grill going and taught me how to turn the burgers, I had time to look around and remember.  I owe so much to my family, who saw that I was educated, fed, clothed and cared for.  Yet, I also remember the volunteers who worked in organizations like Junior Achievement that taught me things that my family could not.

I was reminded that giving of your time is more valuable than giving money.

What I really admire about KPACE is that they not only give to the students but they also teach the students to give to others even less fortunate.

To my fellow budding curmudgeons, find an opportunity to share something with those who are less fortunate.  Seeing children laughing and playing with each other warmed the cockles of my heart. Please give yourself the chance to experience something similar by volunteering.

Thanks to: Darcy Moss, Maverick Moxey  the children of Ridgeland Primary School, and the volunteers of KPACE for making me a better man.

Now, lest anyone think I was getting soft and sentimental, we’ll return to your regularly scheduled grouch.

 

 

Filed Under: Adventure and Travel, Faith, Random Scribblings
September 24, 2012 by 2 Comments

Flying Kites

Image courtesy of Photositefaces

 

I am on Fort Charlotte watching three sisters trying to heist a kite. In this time we live in I cannot watch too closely lest I frighten the girls and their parents. Yet, I take quick glances at the three of them.  The oldest about 10-12 is the expert in charge although she is holding the string too short to catch the light breeze blowing on this late summer evening. The middle child is giving suggestions and holds the kite off the ground while her sister prepares to do another run to get it into the air.  The youngest who seems to be 4 or 5 is bouncing about excitedly, making frantic grabs for the kite string and enjoying this new adventure to the utmost.

I watch, smile and remember when we would fly kites.  My brother would make them from coconut leaf spines, newspaper, sewing thread, flour and water.  He would make the kites one day and the glue made from water and flour would have to dry overnight.  I’d spend the whole evening asking him if he would allow me to fly his kite until he relented and said yes or my mother got tired and sent us to bed.  The thought of being allowed to do something with my brother and his friends (The big boys) was like being allowed into a special club, even if that something was holding a kite string.

Now, I am a man happily watching these children, not with the melancholy happiness that sets in when we remember the things we used to do, instead it is the happiness of watching children be happy, with such a simple thing, as flying kites.

Filed Under: Random Scribblings
June 24, 2012 by 33 Comments

Forty by 40: The Big List of Things I Learnt By The Age of Forty.

By the age of 40 any reasonably intelligent person should know some stuff.  Not the stuff that  you were forced to learn in high school, or paid good money to learn in college but a realization about the way the world really works.  Its an epiphany  about your life, your career, your relationship, that once learnt changes your perception of everything else in the world.

By the age of 40 any reasonably intelligent person knows that other people also know some stuff.  This is the point at which we must really sit down with friends, family, colleagues and listen, truly listen.  When we reach that point we accept the truism of Eleanor Roosevelt, “Learn from the mistakes of others.  You can’t live long enough to make them all yourself.”

Here are forty things I knew to be irrevocably and undeniably true by the age of forty.  Some you will agree with, others you will outright reject, either way leave a comment and share some of your own.  Initials have been used to protect the philosophical.

Let the Epiphanies begin:

 

Family

1) Not everyone likes you, and  no matter what you do not everyone wishes to be your friend.
Eula Delancy

2) People who talk behind my back are talking to my ass.
Elise Delancy

3) Keep the home fire burning, or someone else will try to out it with gas.
Kevin Delancy

4) As the old people would say, “Full moon but empty arms”.
Elva Minnis

Harsh Realities

5) The only thing worse than a spanking is not learning from a spanking.
J.D

6) Everyone has a plan until they get hit. “Iron” Mike Tyson

7) The time is always right to do right.  Nelson Mandela

8) Every panties off is not a grind.  M.M

9) “Fuck it” is sometimes a perfectly justifiable philosophy.  J.D

10) A man has got to know his limitations.
Clint Eastwood  as“Dirty Harry” in Magnum Force

Work, The Public Service and Governance

11) When a country has a just leader, oxen pull carts filled with grain to feed the people.
When a country has an unjust leader, the oxen are slaughtered for food and horses pull chariots to war.

The Master of Demon Valley.


12) Weapons are the instruments of misfortune, they should only be used when unavoidable.  A ruler should not mobilize an army out of anger, military leaders should not provoke war out of wrath.  Anger can revert to joy.  Wrath can revert to delight. A nation destroyed cannot be restored to existence and the dead cannot be restored to life.
Sun Tzu “The Art of War”

13) It’s easier to run ya mouth than to run a country.
Sir Lynden Pindling

14) All problems in the world are alike, in the beginning they may be hard to understand yet easy to solve, but given time they become easy to understand but impossible to solve.
Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince

15)First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.”Mahatma Gahndi .

16) There is something horribly wrong with a world in which there are more lawyers than good chefs.  Peter Mayle, Acquired Tastes.
17) The public service is a place where you have to know when to bow and when to duck.
A.C

18) Remember, you don’t have to be 500 percent better to earn 500 percent more money.  Usually, the difference is very, very small between top notch producers and the multitudes of mediocre people.
David Schwartz Ph.d The Magic of Self-Direction

19) I sure hope we’re making the right mistake.  John Morley

20) The people who get promoted are those that work hardest . . . . on getting promoted.
J.D

21) Slunkers  f^*king get, Slunkers f^*king pay.
Bahamian workers saying.

22) The marketplace is a battlefield
The Master of Demon Valley

23) If ‘A’ equals success, then the formula is : ‘A=X+Y+Z, where X is work, Y is play  and Z is keeping your mouth shut.
Albert Einstein

Love and All that lies Therein

24) In every relationship, one person is in control, if you have to ask who it is; it ain’t you.
A.C

25) Love is a species of warfare,
Slack troopers go elsewhere.  Ovid 6th century B.C

26) Girls in PoomPoom shorts ain’ for free.  Dancehall song

27) The ways of a woman are past understanding. King Solomon

28) When a man loves A woman
Can’t keep his mind on nothing else
He’ll trade the world
For the good thing he’s found
Percy Sledge, “When A Man Loves A Woman”

29) I would rather have curses from you than kisses from any other woman.
Captain Troy “Far From The Madding Crowd” by Thomas Hardy

30) Love and do what thou wilt.  St. Augustine

31) Boy, if you think saying sorry when you wrong is hard, wait ‘till you have to apologize when you right just to keep the peace.
Sister Jennie Reckley


32) Thou shalt Love thy neighbour, as thyself.
Matthew Chp.22 vs.39

Life and Luck

33) I returned and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill, but time and chance happens to them all.
Ecclesiates Chp.9 vs 11

34) Today they take from the field and put you on the throne.  Tomorrow they take you from the throne and put a saddle on your back.                                                                          Fountain of Persian Wisdom

35) But wilt thou know of vain man; faith without works is dead?
James Chp.2 vs. 20

36) It is compassion rather than the principle of justice which can guard us against being unjust to our fellow man.
Bruce Lee, “The Tao of Jeet Kun Do.”

37) An hour of real justice is worth 70 years of prayer.
Turkish proverb

38) When elephants fight, only the grass is trampled.
African proverb

39) Malice extends folly.  Proverb from the game of Go

40) Many people now describe themselves as ‘gurus’ that’s because the word ‘charlatan’ is too hard to spell.

Francis Wheen. “How Mumbo-Jumbo Conquered The World

 

 

Filed Under: Health, Money, Politics, Random Scribblings, Women
June 18, 2012 by 1 Comment

7 Ways To Get Lucky

7 About To Happen Three Different Ways

Photo courtesy of fd

 

 

 

During the last three months, the following has happened:

Had two wisdom teeth removed

Repaired a leak in my roof  ($1400)

Received a $529 water bill, regularly its $60 but there was a leak in the toilet that went un-noticed for over a month.

Needless to say, I want some good luck to pass my way, although like many people, I may be overlooking it.  Like me, you’ll probably be relieved to know there is no such thing as being, “born under a bad sign” or even “born lucky”.  Luck we have always believed cannot be tested, graded or quantified but that belief is now being challenged scientifically.

Luck, is the specialty of psychologist Richard Wiseman, author of, “Changing Your Luck, Changing Your Life: The Four Essential Principles.” I have  compiled and summarized from an article in the December 2005 issue of Men’s Health; a story in the online version of  the magazine FastCompany (www.fastcompany.com); and Wiseman’s own website.

 

1) Make the most of Chance

Lucky people take note of their surroundings and what is going on, that is why they ‘find’ money , love, opportunities.

2) Talk to Strangers

A strong network of friends and associates opens the door to numerous learning experiences and good experiences.

3) Be Cool

Staying relaxed allows you to always be aware of what’s going on.  Besides no one wishes to associate with uptight people

 

4) Listen To Your Gut

A ‘gut feeling’, intuition or as Bahamians would say, “My spirit don’t take to dat”.  These feelings are caused by things we notice at a sub-conscious level.  The sub-conscious collects these observations and forms a pattern that we cannot understand consciously but instead react to as a ‘feeling’.

 

 

5) Change your Routine

Doing the same thing over and over doesn’t bring you into contact with different people nor are you as observant in surroundings that you are very familiar with.

 

6) Expect Good Luck and/or Carry a Lucky Charm

If you believe something positive will happen, you will be more likely to spot it when it does.  A lucky charm has no special powers but if it gives confidence, use it. (I have a lucky headband/blindfold)

 

7) Outlast Bad Luck and Turn it Good

Don’t dwell on the bad, if necessary imagine how it could have been even worse, then you’ll feel better and be able to look for new opportunities.

To all of you, The Best of Luck in everything you do.

 

 

P.S  Anytime you feel unlucky, walk outside and look at the people sleeping in the streets, begging or eating out of the trash and think of how blessed you really are.

 

P.S: For more on the science of luck, visit www.fastcompany.com and type the word, “luck” in the Search field.  The word “creativity” also has good articles.  You can also go straight to the source.

Filed Under: Health, Money, Random Scribblings
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