How to Impress A Woman on Valentine’s Day When You Are Broke .

How to Impress A Woman on Valentine’s Day When You Are Broke .

“Blow me a kiss from across the room

Old time romance

Say I look nice when I’m not

Touch my hair as you pass my chair

Little things mean a lot

Give me your arm as we cross the street

Call me at six on the dot

A line a day when you’re far away

Little things mean a lot

Don’t have to buy me diamonds and pearls

Champagne, sables or such

I never cared much for diamonds and pearls

Cause honestly honey, they just cost money

Give me your hand when I’ve lost the way

Give me your shoulder to cry on

Whether the day is bright or gray

Give me your heart to rely on …..”

Kitty Kallen – Little Things Mean A Lot

All the way back in 2013, I wrote a post called 5 Ways to impress a woman on Valentine’s Day …. Even if you are Broke and Clueless.  It has become one of the most popular posts on this blog.   This is probably because a whole bunch of men find themselves both broke and clueless at the very time of year that there is a major emphasis on spending money.  Well, time has passed, and for those of you who are broke, clueless, cheap fiscally retentive or any combination thereof, I’m adding ONE more.

I’ve decided to follow the same format as in the previous post, so here goes.

Material List (What you need) A small notebook, preferably something with colour on the cover. A pen (Duh!) and any kind of coloured marker, pencils or pens.

What To Do:  Each day before Valentine’s write something that you love or appreciate about the object of your affection.  Is she really tall, really short, have a ridiculous laugh, specializes in malapropisms, etc. Is she really kind to animals, volunteers often, takes care of her granny? Are there things about herself that makes her confidence falter but that you accept or even find endearing ( a big belly, perhaps? Careful this is for experts only.) All of these are starting points, to express your love.

You could also just crib from me – since I cribbed from someone else – and fill in the blanks on this list:

I appreciate how you …….

You look great wearing …..

You make me happy

I get turned on when you…..

I love you so very much

Now, using pens, coloured markers or pencils, draw little hearts, flowers and kisses.  If you don’t have any real artistic talent and draw like a 4th grader, even better.  Love can always use a touch of silliness.

All done, wrap it up and hand over. Expect smiles if she’s not a hardcore gold digger. Let me just say that this works best if you’ve been dating more than three months.  If you’ve never spoken to her in your life then this just seems stalker-ish.

Points: Plus 10 points if you write some original poetry

             Plus 5 if you copy some song lyrics created at least 20 years before you were born

            Minus 10 points if you misspell her name.

             Instant Death if you give it to the wrong girlfriend.

All the best this Valentine’s Day.

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